


Please Don't Shout (I Bruise Easily)

by Curtissemily_38



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Established Relationship, Happy Ending, M/M, Team as Family, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-07 13:45:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19086268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Curtissemily_38/pseuds/Curtissemily_38
Summary: Their little family dynamic is perfect, until it isn't. Steve says some things he really shouldn't have, but he'll have a chance to make things right.Won't he?





	Please Don't Shout (I Bruise Easily)

**Author's Note:**

> So this is un-apologetically 2012 Fandom Avengers. I mean the whole shebang. Clint in the vents, Coulson is alive, everyone has their own floor in the tower, movie nights and team dinners are a thing, and anything else you could think of.  
> Also this is the longest piece of fiction I've written in a very long time, so my apologies if it's difficult to read. I'm not used to writing anything that isn't a technical report :/  
> I'd love to hear what you all think!

Tony had thought they’d been having a nice evening.

The air had a comforting warmth that only came from the beginnings of summer, as the last dregs of cold from spring waned off. It was like a blanket of clouds, soothing and tranquil and just the perfect temperature. Though the familiar smells of over-populated city were still present, the lightness of the air held it at bay from being overwhelming. The savory smells from the surrounding restaurants helped to ward it off.

The gentle sounds of friendly chatter on the side street were a harsh contrast to the blaring of horns and shouting that came from the main roads. Thankfully, the surrounding buildings blocked the majority of those noises. A muffled cheer came from inside a sports bar, and pleasant string music wafted out of the Bistro across the courtyard. A quick laugh burst from a group dining in the patio a few tables away.

The sun had begun its decent a few minutes earlier, and the whole street was washed in a gentle yellow glow. It gave the metal seating and building accents a goldish tint.

 _‘What’d Clint call it? Golden hour?’_ Tony thought idly, sipping on his glass of water. He briefly remembered Clint spending the better part of an evening trying to take the perfect selfie a few weeks back, claiming that he needed to wait for the “golden hour” so he could get the perfect “gram”. Whatever that meant.

Tony didn’t linger on the memory. There was a more pressing issue at hand.

The team had been out celebrating their latest victory, if it could even be called that. Strange had managed to bring some fun little creatures to the city during one of his magical escapades. The man had mostly gotten it under control, but the Avengers figured they could lend a hand regardless. The whole ordeal had been over within an hour and minimal property damage had been done. So all-in-all, a victory.

The team had been sitting in amicable silence on their way back to the tower. Natasha was cleaning her equipment and stowing them away in their proper places. Tony was flying the quinjet. Okay well maybe Jarvis was doing the majority of the flying, but Tony was making sure nothing went south. Steve was writing up the details from the incident to send back to Shield with Coulson. The Hulk hadn’t made an appearance, so Bruce was reading some science article, in a chipper mood. And Clint and Thor were in a yelling match about what to have for dinner.

Thor, easily entertained by even the simplest foods, wanted an obscene number of pizzas ordered to the tower. Clint, with a remarkably unpredictable pallet, was craving something more refined. No one else could have cared less about _what_ they were having, just that something was to be had.

After letting them bicker for a few minutes, Tony decided to end it. “Oh for fucks sake, we’ll go out. We haven’t gone out in a while, right? Right. We’re going out. I know somewhere where we can all get what we want.” He landed the quinjet a moment later. “Put on your civvies, kiddos. Meet in the garage in a half hour.”

They’d all taken quick showers and dressed in the least remarkable clothing they owned. For Bruce, that was easy. A casual button down and some khakis did the trick. Steve and Thor had to wear something slightly looser to hide their bulk. Nothing screamed “Superhero” like bulging muscles. Thor loved hoodies with big pockets in the front and Steve made do with a light fitting jacket. Natasha sported a similar jacket to Steve’s. As she passed by Clint’s room, without even looking in she gave a sharp “no.” He always tried to wear skin-tight leather pants when they went out and somebody always had to stop him. He gave a whine and went to change into regular jeans and t-shirt. As for Tony, unfortunately the press had gotten wind of every single one of his looks. From his sharp tuxedos saved only for galas, right down to his little lacey undies he was wearing in a leaked home sex video taken in his pre-Iron Man years. He had to throw on a ball cap and some completely unfashionable sunglasses along with his non-ripped jeans and a plain t-shirt.

Tony _hated_ wearing plain shirts. But it was for the good of the cause, so he did it anyways.

They met in the garage where Happy was already waiting with a car. It was a very short limousine that could easily be mistaken as just another fancy car with some new, weird, stretched-out frame. It was inconspicuous enough to get the six of them around.

They filed in and Happy gave a glance in the rear-view mirror. “Where to, Boss?”

“The courtyard,” Tony answered. After a pointed look from Steve, he tacked on “ _please.”_

Happy gave a little laugh and shifted into gear.

The quick trip over had been uneventful, and so was dinner. They’d gone to a quiet little area in the city off the main paths. Several restaurants lined a small alcove of picnic tables and urban shrubbery. Lights had been strung between each restaurant and a small fire-pit sat in the center. It looked like something out of the Midwest, not in the middle of a giant metropolitan city.

The team was able to get their own individual meals and meet at a table hidden behind some trees. None of the other patrons seemed to notice them. Either that or they just didn’t care.

It really had been such a nice evening. Food was shared (or maybe Clint stole a dumping off Tony’s plate and almost got a fork in the hand for it), tales of heroism were recalled (Thor sharing about his time on Asgard), and overall good company was had.

Except…

Except something was off.

They were finishing up their meals and thinking about hitting up somewhere for coffee, or maybe going to see a movie. Clint was giving details about some new comedy he wanted to see when everything went south.

Over at the garbage bins, Steve was slamming his dirty tray onto the stack. Not enough force to cause any damage, but enough to show he was clearly frustrated. Tony studied the harsh lines of his face as he stalked back over, his hands shoved deep in his pockets. He just looked angry and irritated, like the garbage receptacles had personally insulted his mother. Something had clearly set him off.

They were standing out of sight of the other patrons while deciding what to do next. The team turned towards Steve, and Tony placed a casual hand on his arm. “Everything alright over there? Do I need to send the wonder spies to interrogate the waste bins?” Tony was trying for humor, hoping it would help Steve relax.

It didn’t work.

Steve brushed Tony off and huffed. “It’s nothing.”

The team shared a couple of glances. The thing was, lately, Steve hadn’t really been acting himself. They were closing in on the anniversary after he went into the ice and as the date drew closer, he drew more into himself. It would be understandable if this hadn’t been going on for a month and a half now.

Tony, the ever-diligent boyfriend (yes, he could be diligent when he put some thought into it) had been working overtime to try and keep Steve’s bad thoughts at bay. He’d been doing well in this century so far, and had even seemed content for quite a while. The “team bonding” events Coulson had lined up actually worked most of the time, and after settling their differences, Steve and Tony had started their relationship. Tony was certainly happy, and he finally felt like he had a family.

He’d thought Steve felt the same way.

Except, recently he’d been making statements about missing his past and Peggy and Bucky and the sorts. He made comments about not feeling like he belonged in the future and how he wished he could go back.

Tony remembered Steve once saying he “felt like he’d never be happy here.” Tony’d had a hard time fighting back his tears.

These comments weren’t terribly often, but after a while, they’d started to take their toll. Tony always put in extra effort when he noticed Steve start to get the far-away look in his eyes. He’d take Steve to his favorite restaurants and all the museums in New York and do silly touristy things. Anything to help him take the edge off.

It usually worked.

But now…

Clint clapped Steve on the shoulder and took the lead on trying to diffuse the situation. “Recycling can be a bitch, I know. Maybe we should call it a night? It was a long day and I don’t know about you guys, but I ate waaaay too much.” He put a hand over his stomach for emphasis. “Why don’t we just head home?”

That clearly hadn’t been the thing to say.

“That place is _not_ my home! I don’t _have_ a home anymore!” Steve shouted as he slapped Clint’s hand off his shoulder.

Clint quickly tried to backtrack. “Hey sorry sorry! We’ll just go back to the tower. No big de-“

Tony suddenly pulled his glasses off. “ _Enough_.” He interjected, glaring at Steve. “I expect you to apologize to Clint.”

Time seemed to stand still, and everyone held their breath. Nobody liked when mom and dad fought.

Steve turned to Tony and gave him a scrutinizing look. “ _Excuse_ me?”

“I said ‘ _apologize to Clint’_.”

Both Tony and Steve took a step closer to each other. Neither one was the type to back down from a challenge.

“First of all, I _do not_ have anything to apologize for. And second, don’t you dare treat me like a child.” Steve crossed his arms over his chest and puffed up tall, glaring down at Tony.

“Well if you’re going to act like a child, I’m going to treat you like a child. There’s no reason for you to be throwing a tantrum! What even is your problem tonight?”

“I don’t have a problem.”

“Clearly you do!”

Bruce made to interrupt but was cut short.

“It’s the damn recycling! I never know what goes where! It used to all just go in the same bin but now it’s a complete damn mess!”

Tony pulled the cap off his head and brushed a hand over his lower face. “Your attitude is all over some fucking trash? Jesus Cap, you could’ve just asked us for help!”

Steve took half a step back and threw his hands out in an act of frustration. “It’s not just the trash, its everything in this century! I’m always confused and everything is always changing and I just don’t belong here!”

Tony knew Steve struggled sometimes, but he always tried to give him resources to help. He wanted Steve to feel like he belonged but sometimes it felt like Steve _just_ _didn’t_ want to belong. Tony took a small step towards Steve and tried to relax himself. “Listen Steve, we’re all here for you and just want to help you adjust. You can ask us for anything. You belong here with us.”

“I don’t _want_ to have to ask for help for every little thing. I don’t want any help at all! I don’t want to be _here_!”

The others had been trying unsuccessfully to act like they weren’t listening, but all their faces were sporting frowns. Tony’s expression turned cold again. “You can’t possibly mean that.”

“Don’t tell me what I mean!” Steve stabbed a finger vaguely in the direction of the tower. “That tower is _not_ my home.” He swept his hand towards the team. “You all are _not_ my family!” He got right up into Tony’s face, “and I wish we’d all just stop pretending like we’re happy!”

“ _Steve!”_ Natasha interjected from the side. This was getting way out of hand. But her shout went unnoticed.

Tony, who’d kept his composure remarkably well up until this point, decided he’d had enough. “You know what _Cap,_ I don’t give a flying fuck that you’re in a mood right now. If I recall, _you’re_ the one who pushed for all this “team-bonding” bullshit. _You’re_ the one that insisted on us living together. _You’re_ the one who forced us to be a family! And you can’t just fucking take that away!”

Steve tried to answer but Tony cut him off. “And do you even care that what you’re saying may be affecting us? Have you ever considered how we feel hearing you always talk about not wanting to be here? Fuck, I won’t even speak for everyone else but _god dammit_ Steve, it fucking _hurts!_

“I’ve been working my ass off trying to make you happy and I can’t even get a god damn “thank you” from time to time! I can’t keep doing this if it’s not going to get us anywhere!”

“For Christ’s sake, Tony, not everything is about you all the time! You don’t have to take everything so personally!”

“Oh right, because this is all about me and not at all about you whining about the past!”

“How am I even supposed to even depend on you when you’re not around half the time!?”

“Do you mean while I’m at fucking work _?_ Because unlike _you,”_ Tony gave a brief pause to stick his finger at Steve’s chest, “I have a day job.”

“You don’t even care about your job! You just like to play around in that damn workshop and ignore your responsibilities!”

At this point, everyone could tell the tension was getting a bit too thick. Either this argument was going to peter out calmly, or something explosive was going to happen. It was almost never the former.

Tony moved into Steve’s space, inches from his face. “My _job_ is what pays the bills. But _excuse_ _me_ for trying to keep this team afloat. I should just be at your beck and call every moment of every day, right? Just like everybody from your _fucking past_ was.”

Steve somehow managed to move closer. He was heated from anger and you could feel the restraint flowing off him. “You better stop while you’re ahead.”

Tony had no such intentions of backing down. The sun had all but set by this point and he was sick of this pathetic little fight. Determined to end it, Tony may have said somethings he wasn’t quite proud of it. “Mhmm. Because everyone was always there for you back in the 40s. The commandos? Always there. Never on a mission.

“Peggy was by your side 100% of the time, right? She never had anything else to do except take care of you.

“Oh, and your best friend? He was definitely always with you? Right?” Tony gave just the smallest pause, just enough to really emphasize his point. “Bucky was with you _‘til the end of the line’_.”

The next few seconds happened so fast, no one could honestly say what had happened. Only that when it was over, Tony had ended up on his back, slightly propped up with one elbow and the other hand covering his left eye. A look of disbelief spread across his features.

And Steve was standing over him with one hand folded into a fist, breaths coming out hot and heavy.

Immediately, Steve released the tension in his body and dropped his hands. “Oh my god. Tony I didn’t mean-“ he went to take a step towards him, hands reaching out to help him up, but Tony flinched reactively and Thor placed a hand on Steve’s chest in response. Steve couldn’t tear his eyes away from his boyfriend, the look of hurt and betrayal sharp on his face.

A second passed and Tony’s eyes went cold. He started pushing himself up and Clint came over, hands grabbing at his arm to pull him off the ground. Tony shrugged him off. “I’m fine. I’m _fine_.” He stood and brushed off his pants, “Well. I’ll be heading home now. Oh wait. Excuse me. I meant the _tower_.” He snarled at Steve, the word tower dripping like venom.

He stalked towards the street and whistled for a taxi. As he shuffled in, he muttered quietly, “maybe I’m the only pathetic dumbass here that thought we were a family.” The others could hear him tell the taxi driver as he was closing the door, “I’ll give you a thousand dollars if you get me to Avengers tower in less than 10 minutes,” and then he was gone.

A moment of silence passed between the group, broken suddenly by Clint’s quiet “fuck”.

Natasha sent a text to Happy and started towards the street. “We’re heading back.” Happy pulled up a moment later and she flicked her thumb towards the car. “Let’s go.”

Bruce, shyly, spoke up. “If it’s all the same to you, I think I’ll walk back.” He didn’t need to tell them he needed the time to cool off, that he needed to not be in the small space of that car. They already understood. The green flecks in his eyes spoke volumes.

“Could I trouble you for your company?” Thor asked. He was also upset from the situation, but someone needed to be close to Bruce in case his green alter ego decided to make his displeasure known.

Bruce nodded a yes, and they started off in silence.

Clint was already in the car and Natasha was starting to get in. She turned and saw Steve hadn’t moved a muscle since Tony left. She was half tempted to leave him there to find his own way back, but that wasn’t the mature way to handle the situation. She snapped her fingers at him and pointed at the car, “Get in.”

When Happy asked where the rest of the group was, Clint just shook his head.

The rest of the ride was silent.

* * *

 

The next couple of days at Avengers Tower were tense at best, hostile at worst. Thankfully, through Tony and Steve’s crafty avoidance of one another, the worst was never reached.

Tony secluded himself in his workshop, focusing on SI projects and new equipment for the team. He needed to be distracted from the shitshow that was his life, and it was either his work or the liquor cabinet on the common floor. But not even Steve being a rightful ass was going to make him fall off the wagon.

 So maybe that was the only healthy choice he’d made that week, but at least it was something. He caught a few hours of sleep here and there, avoided team dinners at all costs, if they were even still having them, and living off the stash of granola bars and assorted dried fruits he had hidden around the lab. The only reason he left was for an important shareholder meeting. And he’d unfortunately have to venture out again soon for the upcoming socialite networking event.

And he definitely didn’t miss Steve at all. Nope. Not one bit.

Steve had also been trying to avoid the team as much as possible. After getting the cold shoulder from Clint, a harsh glare from Natasha, a disappointed glance from Thor, and a frustrated sigh from Bruce, he took a moment to really actually consider the recent fight.

He thought about the things Tony had said, and how he’d been acting the last couple weeks. It was true, he had been in rough mood as the anniversary of him going in the ice was coming up. It made him think about his past all the time. It seemed like the smallest things could remind him of what he’d lost. The faintest smell could remind him of muggy summer afternoons, sitting in the park with Bucky. Or the vibrant red lipstick on display looked like the exact shade Peggy would wear. It stung to think about the people he’d never see again.

And god, sometimes the future could be hard. It certainly had gotten easier since he’d first woken up, but he still wasn’t accustomed to the little nuances that made up this century.

First of all, people were so wasteful now. Back during the war, you ate anything you could get your hands on, whether it was palatable or not. And technology had made bounds in the last 70 years. With all the world’s knowledge packed into the smallest computers he’d ever seen; Steve couldn’t believe there were still so many ignorant people out there. And every time he thought he’d gotten the hang of a piece of technology, something new came to take its place and he had to start all over.

It was so damn frustrating.

But he’d let himself get so caught up in the negative things lately that he completely ignored all the wonderful things about the future.

For instance, even if technology could be frustrating, it was still so impressive. The ability to communicate with anyone on the planet and keep up to date on the whole world’s news was amazing. People were so creative. And art, books, science, and anything he could think of was so easily accessible now.

He was able to try foods he could have never imagined existing. He’d eaten curry, sushi, pad thai, and every single type of pizza you could get in New York. He visited fantastic places he’d only read about in books when he was a boy. He’d seen the Eiffel Tower, visited Japan, taken a trip to Rome, and had many more trips planned for the future. Anything he could ever want was right at his fingertips.

But the best part of the future was Tony.

When Steve thought about Tony, he was afraid he might actually swoon.

Where to start? The man was a genius, and that was putting it lightly. Tony was so far ahead of all his competition. And every single thing he made left Steve breathless. Maybe he couldn’t understand what it all did, but it was all just so fascinating and mesmerizing. The man made things that Steve wouldn’t have even thought remotely possible, and he did it with such ease. Well, mostly with ease. Accidents did have a tendency to happen in the workshop.

And maybe the genius played a role in this, but goodness was he attractive. Steve couldn’t keep his hands off Tony whether he was in a ratty pair of jeans or a million-dollar suit. And he had to have been the most well-toned and eccentric billionaire on the planet. He could make Steve laugh until tears rolled down his face and his side was in stiches. What was better than a handsome, smart as a whip, funny guy?

One that was as kind as Tony.

He was thoughtful and sincere and wouldn’t hesitate to give everything he had to make someone else’s life just a smidge better. Everything he did, he did to improve people’s lives.

He gave the team a place to live and feel safe. He outfitted them with the latest weapons and gear, all while running a company on the side. He kept the press satisfied and the government at bay. He provided everything they needed and never so much as asked for a thank you.

And Steve had to admit, Tony really had been going the extra mile for him lately. He was trying to make him feel more adapted to the new century.

He was trying to make Steve feel at home.

Steve groaned when he realized he’d thrown everything Tony had done for him to the side like it hadn’t meant anything at all. He felt like such an ass sometimes.

Maybe it was time to start making amends.

* * *

 

Tony was elbow deep in the Mark IX (Mark VIII had been destroyed in a Hydra stakeout a couple months ago) when his phone started to ring. He sighed and started to wriggle out. “Who is it, J?” he asked.

“Colonel Rhodes, sir.”

Tony considered for a moment the whole situation and whether or not he wanted to spew his feelings to Rhodey. “Any chance I could get away with not taking this call?”

Jarvis, ever helpful and knowing full well Rhodey would just be suspicious if Tony didn’t pick up, responded back, “That would be ill advised, sir.”

Tony just grunted and flicked his hand towards a projector. A moment later, Rhodey’s face appeared in the air. “You were supposed to call me a week ago about- _what the hell_?”

Tony had pulled off his goggles to reveal the rather nasty looking bruise he was sporting on his left eye. He’d like to say he’d forgotten about it, but he just didn’t have the motivation to try to cover it up with concealer while he was holed up in his lab.

Tony wiped his face, leaving a grease streak on his cheek. He waved his soldering iron wielding hand in dismissal, “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.” You could practically hear the ‘ _please let it go’_ in his voice.

Rhodey had no such intentions. “Tones, Tony, _how the hell_ did you manage to get a black eye?” He was studying his screen displaying Tony’s face, looking for any clues on how it had happened.

“That thing we had to do for Strange last week. C’mon you know those bug creatures I’m talking about. I took a hit to the face plate and got this for my troubles. No big deal.”

“ _No big deal?_ You look like Rocky used you for a sandbag. There’s no way that happened on a mission. The face plate would’ve shattered.”

 _‘Damn it.’_ Tony thought. He should’ve expected Rhodey wouldn’t buy that. He tried to play it off casually, throwing in a laugh for good measure. “You caught me. It was a bar fight. You think this is bad, you should see the other guy!” That was a bold-faced lie and they both knew it, but Tony figured he could just keep redirecting until Rhodey gave up. “While I have you, you need to stop by soon so I can upgrade your thermal sensors. I’d do it remotely, but where’s the fun in that?”

Rhodey gave him a scrutinizing look, his gaze sharp. “We’re not done talking about this.” He looked around the rest of the room, or at least what he could see from the screen. “And where’s boy wonder?”

Tony almost, _almost_ flinched at the mention of Steve, but quickly reeled himself in. “Ah out doing who knows what. Probably destroying a punching bag or giving some kids a lesson on justice and morality.” He didn’t pause to give Rhodey a chance to respond. “Back to the suit. When are you stopping by? I have that rich people thing next week and a board meeting a couple days after, but I’m free the rest of the time. Really, I can’t have you out and about protecting our assets with outdated tech. Tsk tsk, are you trying to give me a bad name?”

Rhodey didn’t say anything for a minute. “You’re not telling me something.”

Tony gave him a cheeky grin. “When have I _ever_ lied to you, Rhodey-bear?” He batted his eye lashes dramatically, hoping to end the interrogation quickly.

Rhodey sighed and threw his hands up. “Fine! I’ll stop by on Monday.” He went to end the call but stopped. “If something’s going on, you can talk to me about it. Just give me a call.”

The line went dead and Tony put his head in his hands. It had been a whole week since that stupid fight with Steve, and he’d been miserable ever since.

Tony was no stranger to self-loathing, but hearing Steve dismiss their home and their family like that really was like taking a bullet straight through the heart.

Tony couldn’t possibly have been the only one of them to believe they were a family, right? Acquaintances and coworkers didn’t spend every other Thursday night bickering over what movie to watch. They didn’t live in the same building and spend all their time on one floor, even though each has their own. They didn’t share almost every meal or spend absurd amounts of time doing silly things with one another. Those were things families did.

Or so Tony had thought, but he wouldn’t really know, would he.

God, it felt like a huge knot had settled in his chest and wasn’t planning to leave any time soon. Tony didn’t want to think about the rest of the team not actually wanting to spend time together. He swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to get back to work.

He didn’t mean to sound like a total sap, but it had been nice having these people around. It was nice feeling like he belonged for once. Every time Thor picked him up in a big bear hug, Clint popped out of a vent to scare the shit out of him, Bruce invited him down into his lab, or Natasha made him a warm cup of tea, well he just swelled with happiness.

And every time Steve held him in his arms, smiled at him like Tony’d hung the moon, and said “ _I love you”_ , Tony thought he might just burst from joy.

And Steve just went and washed that all down the drain.

The soldering iron in Tony’s hand slipped and brushed against the fingers holding a wire in place. “Fuck!” Tony put the tool in its stand and stuck his finger in his mouth, trying to blink the wetness out of his eyes. Clearly he wasn’t going to be handy for a couple hours.

He turned to his computer and decided to work on some programming instead. If he just focused on his work right now, he wouldn’t have to wonder what he was going to do about the team, how he’d handle seeing them and not thinking of them as family.

* * *

 

“ _Did you fucking do this to him!?”_

Tony heard the shout from the kitchen and had half a moment to consider just turning around and going back to his lab.

Probably wouldn’t serve anyone well to have a military colonel beat up Captain America, though.

He booked it up the stairs to see Rhodey, rage in his eyes and a photograph in his hands, being held back by Thor.

“You son of a bitch! Who the fuck do you think you are!?” Rhodey waved the picture aimlessly, haphazardly trying to get out of Thor’s grip. “Well!? You’re not even going to try to deny it!”

Steve, being on the receiving end of the tirade, looked absolutely miserable. His eyes were downcast and his mouth was set in a tense line. He looked like he wished Thor would just walk away so Rhodey could land a couple of good hits.

Clint and Natasha were also in the kitchen, intently watching the scene unfold. They looked ready to spring into action the second things turned sour. Clint must’ve been in the middle of making a sandwich. Assorted lunch meats, cheeses, and vegetables were laid out on the counter. If this went on much longer, the fillings would go bad. And were those _pop tarts_ for the bread?

Natasha had clearly been slicing an apple, and it looks like she’d reluctantly set her knife down.

“What kind of person gives their boyfriend a _black eye!?_ I’m gonna kick your ass! We’ll see how you like it!”

Tony rushed into the kitchen and stepped in Rhodey’s line of sight, “Whoa whoa, what seems to be the issue?” He gave Thor a nod, who released Rhodey and stepped away. “I thought you were coming in Monday, Sugarplum?”

Rhodey barely tore his eyes off Steve to look at Tony. “Move, Tony. He’s not getting away with this.” Tony made a move to interrupt but Rhodey spoke over him. “No! That piece of shit is not getting away with beating you!”

He started to advance on Steve, and everybody in the room tensed up. Tony put his hands to Rhodey’s chest to give a little resistance. “Relax, relax! There’s no need for you to defend my honor. It was just a misunderstanding. He didn’t _beat me._ ” He put his arm around Rhodey’s shoulders and spun them both around. “C’mon, lets go get something to eat and then I’ll show you the upgrades. You’re never gonna wanna leave the suit after these!”

Rhodey reluctantly let himself be pulled away. As they were leaving, he looked over his shoulder and shoved a finger in Steve’s direction, “Don’t you _ever_ fucking put your hands on him again.” And then they were gone.

Nobody made a move for a few seconds, and then the tensions bled out of the room. Clint spoke up first, “Shit, I thought something was gonna go down.” He picked up a piece of cheese, took a bite and waved the rest of the slice in Steve’s direction. “You’re lucky Tony showed up. I don’t think Thor coulda’ held him back much longer.”

Steve plopped onto the bar stool and let his hands fall into his lab, shaking his head in disbelief. He looked like he regretted Tony coming up, like he’d had rather been bludgeoned by the colonel as some sort of penance for what he’d done.

Natasha finished peeling her apple and popped a piece in her mouth. “I think we’re all just going to assume that you were being a dumbass last week and didn’t really mean what you said?” Steve nodded numbly and she continued, “Okay then. Well, have you made any attempts at apologizing to Tony?”

“I’ve started seeing one of those counselors he told me about a while ago. We’ve only met once but I think it’ll be helpful. I want to start adjusting my outlook on the future so I can really make amends.”

Natasha didn’t show her surprise, but Steve could tell it was there. Thor made no such attempts to conceal his shock. “That’s quite a noble endeavor! I am pleased you have sought out assistance.”

“Yeah, never thought you’d actually go to a professional,” Clint chimed in.

Natasha finished her apple and washed her knife off. “While it’s definitely a good thing that you’re getting help, I think you should try to do something now for Tony.” Steve gave her a confused look and she sighed. “You know, something that lets him know you didn’t mean what you said. And, you know, that you’re _sorry.”_

“Ah, I suppose you’re right.”

Clint perched in the stool next to him. “You know how Tony gets. He’s gonna get it in his head that we don’t want him around and he’s just gonna be all mopey until you fix it. I mean, he’s already been avoiding all of us for the last week. You can’t let him go on like this much longer.”

Steve put his hands up in defeat. “Okay okay. I’ll say something to him when he gets back.”

And they were right. He and Tony couldn’t keep avoiding one another. It wasn’t healthy and it certainly wasn’t helping anyone.

Steve’s shoulders set in determination.

He had work to do.

* * *

 

Tony managed to sneak back into the tower and dodge Steve’s attempts to speak to him for a few more days. He always had an excuse of work or top-secret SI project or just being too busy at the moment. Jarvis had also informed Steve that he’d been asleep for one attempt, and he’d figured it would be best to let the man get what rest he could.

Steve caught his break the night of that fancy party Tony had to attend.

The engineer was manically moving things around his lab, flicking holograms here and there and throwing scraps of half-completed projects in different piles. His mouth was running a mile a minute, likely giving orders to Jarvis. The gala was slated to start in about an hour and a half, but Tony was still in a raggedy pair of jeans and what could barely be considered a top.

Steve’s eyes couldn’t tear away from the other man’s arms, toned biceps and other flattering muscles accentuated by the sleeveless top he was wearing. The knit fabric was tight across his chest, and the hem across his waist was starting to hike up. A sliver of skin was visible, and Steve suddenly found it hard to swallow.

God he really missed Tony.

Shaking himself out of his stupor, Steve lightly rapped on the glass door. Tony didn’t even look up from a stack of papers he was holding, waving haphazardly to indicate the door was unlocked. “-and make sure they have the plans sent over by 7 p.m. _I don’t care_ that it’s after hours on a Thursday, those incompetent assholes at Shield shouldn’t have been left in charge of this.” He must’ve been on a call, since he tapped his ear to shut off a communicator. “Always left to fix other people’s mistakes.” He was shoving a stack of miscellaneous tools and papers to the side of his desk, clearing a space for the new files. “I do _not_ have time for this thing tonigh- oh.”

Tony stopped his tirade as he finally looked up to greet his visitor. He apparently wasn’t expecting it to be Steve. His manic demeanor vanished.

For a moment, the whole charade that was Tony Stark faded away. There were dark circles under his eyes, even though it was a bit difficult to make out under the fading bruise on the left eye. His facial hair wasn’t its typical neat trim, instead threatened to be overtaken by a couple days without shaving. The grease in his hair wasn’t the typical stuffed used to style it for events, instead probably the stuff he used to oil up DUM-E’s joints.

He looked tired.

His façade built back up quickly, and his shoulder’s stiffened with a hint of nervousness. He slowly started to return to his ‘tidying’. “What can I do for you, Cap?”

Steve cleared his throat and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Uh hi, sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” God, he sounded like a nervous teenager. “I was hoping I could talk to you for a few minutes.”

Tony looked like he wanted to say no, but he let the adult in him win this time. “I’ve got about ten minutes until I need to make myself presentable. Sorry if you were hoping for longer. You caught me at a bad time.”

“That’s okay.” Steve watched for a few seconds to see if Tony would stop working, but it didn’t look like he’d be given that allowance. At this point, he’d take what he could get. “Tony, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for what I said.”

Tony seemed to perk up slightly, so Steve started his spiel. He and his counselor had been working on the finer points of his apology over the last two sessions, and he wanted to make sure he got all the points right. “I know I haven’t been very attentive lately, and even though I’m allowed to have these feelings about my past, I shouldn’t have let them interfere with my relationships now. I wasn’t considering how the things I was saying affected the people around me. I’m sorry I didn’t consider your feelings as I spoke about my past. I will be more thoughtful of my actions in the future.”

Tony had stopped his cleaning during Steve’s apology, and turned fully to consider him. The man was standing stock still and hadn’t taken a single breath between words. His voice had stayed steady and gave only the slightest inflection.

Tony crossed his arms over his chest and let out a long breath through his nose. He gave Steve a very pointed look, the disappointment clear in his eyes.

The hurt hadn’t left them, either.

“Listen, that’s a nice speech you put together. And I’m sure you probably mean most of what you said.” Tony took a step towards the door, a step towards Steve. “Have you apologized to the rest of the team yet?”

Steve shook his head slightly, paralyzed from his nerves.

Tony gave one quick flick of his hand to shut down the workshop, and shuffled the two of them out the door. “Try sounding just a little genuine when you talk to them, okay? Some sincerity goes a long way in an apology.”

He started up the steps to leave. Steve, in a last-ditch effort, shot his hand out and grabbed at his wrist. Tony turned and looked him right in the eyes. “Tony, I _really am_ sorry.” He paused. “And I shouldn’t have hit you. I’ll never forgive myself for that.”

Tony looked away, hiding his eyes. He nodded and slipped his hand out of Steve’s grasp. Quietly, he said, “I’m sorry for saying that stuff about Peggy and the Commandos. And Bucky.”

He bolted up the steps, leaving Steve breathless in his wake.

* * *

 

“Shouldn’t his stupid party be over by now?” Clint whined from his seat on the couch.

The team, including Steve, were gathered in the living room waiting for Tony to return from the soiree. It was movie night and they never started without everyone present.

Bruce flipped a page of his book. “It’s not a _party_ , it’s a fundraising event for MIT.” He glanced at his watch. “But, you’re right. It should be over by now.”

There wasn’t any real reason to be alarmed, sometimes these things went longer than strictly established. The team was just antsy to spend some time together.

They were all waiting in their usual spots. Clint was perched on the right arm rest of the couch, catching popcorn midair that Thor was tossing for him. He’d migrate into the actual seat eventually, but he always started like that. Thor was laid out on the rug, already on his second bowl of popcorn. Natasha was curled up in a cushy armchair, a soft open-weave blanket draped over her lap. Bruce sat in the last existing bean bag chair of the century. Tony had no idea where it had even come from, but Bruce liked it. Steve was sitting stiff as a rod on the opposite end of the couch as Clint.

Normally, Tony would be half draped over Steve, half periodically shoving his feet in Clint’s face.

But he hadn’t been present the last two weeks, and there was a visible hole in the group where he was missing.

“Aye, we shall wait all night for our friend, if that’s what it’ll take,” Thor said.

Natasha stretched and started flipping through the news channels. No point in just sitting in silence. “Ideally we won’t have to wait all night. Has he texted you at all, Steve?”

Steve’s hand twitched to reach for his phone, even though he already knew there were no messages from Tony. They still weren’t on speaking terms.

“No. Haven’t heard from him.”

Clint finally slid into the real seat and reached down for the popcorn bowl. “Well call him or something! It’s my turn to pick and I want a double feature!”

When Steve made no move to get his phone out, Natasha sat up and gave him a glare. “You two still haven’t made up? I thought you were going to apologize.”

“I did!” He retorted, a little too fast. “I mean, I told him I was sorry, but he said it wasn’t genuine or sincere or something to that effect.”

“Well were you genuinely sorry?”

“Of course! But I guess it might’ve sounded a little rehearsed…”

Bruce flipped another page in his book. “Tony will come around eventually. He just took it the hardest out of us, is all.”

Steve nearly reeled from that. “You guys were upset too?” He asked in disbelief, giving a glance to the four of them.

Clint and Thor stopped munching on their popcorn, Bruce looked up from his book for the first time, and Natasha raised an eyebrow at him.

“What makes you think that we weren’t?” Clint asked.

Steve suddenly looked stricken with guilt. He really had been an idiot lately. Of course they’d all be hurt by what he said. They were his family too and he’d dismissed them just as badly as he’d dismissed Tony.

He curled up on himself, trying to shrink his massive size. “I really screwed this up, huh?” He sighed. “I’m sorry I said that about you all. You guys really are my family and you didn’t deserve that.”

Bruce snorted. “Hey, Captain Corny, we know. Don’t worry, you can’t shake us that easy.”

“It is nice to hear you admit it though, no lie,” Natasha added.

Clint leaned over and gave him a clap on the shoulder. “You’re good, man. We know you’ve just been on that moody juice this week…” He trailed off as his phone buzzed, pulling his attention away.

Thor didn’t need to add anything. Instead he just offered up the bowl of popcorn. A high honor in that tower.

Tension Steve hadn’t even realized was there bled out of him. He sighed in relief and gave a small smile. It felt like things would finally start returning to normal.

The team settled back into their seats to wait when Clint stood suddenly. He shoved his phone in his pocket, heading towards the door in a way that screamed he wanted to be running, but had to look calm and casual.

“And where are you going? We’re already waiting on one moron.” Natasha looked over her shoulder to see Clint grabbing his jacket. “I’m not waiting on another!”

Clint pulled one boot on. “Listen, I’ve just gotta go pick something up. I’ll be back before Moron A gets here.” He pulled on his other boot and fled out the door towards the elevator, double checking his messages as he went.

 

[ SENDER: metal ass ]

PICK ME UP?

NOT AN EMERGENCY.

 

Some coordinates popped up on Clint’s phone and he headed to the garage. Even though it clearly stated this wasn’t an emergency, he was still a little on edge. Tony _never_ asked to be picked up. Tony never asked for anything. So Clint had at least some reason to be worried. Another message buzzed on his phone.

 

[ SENDER: Nat ]

WHAT’S GOING ON? SHOULD WE BE WORRIED?

 

He got into one of Tony’s cars and sent a quick response.

 

[ REPLY ]

GIVING SOMEONE A RIDE. DON’T WAIT UP.

 

And then he was off.

* * *

 

“Tony, not to be an ass, but how the _fuck_ did you get up here?”

Tony was sitting on the second highest “rung”- so to speak- of one the Manhattan Bridge’s suspension towers. His suit coat was covered in a few dirt spots and wrinkled from exertion. The sleeves of his jacket and dress shirt were pushed up to bare his forearms, and there was a small tear in the hem of his pants.

Clint expected the man to look scared, or sad, or even just tired. But he just looked content.

“The service ladder,” He glanced at Clint, raising an eyebrow in question. “How’d _you_ get up here?”

Service ladder, now that was probably the smart way to get to the top of a bridge. Certainly not the route Clint had chosen.

“The ladder, of course.” Clint carefully sat down next to Tony, just close enough that their shoulders were touching. He paused, taking a couple of slow breaths and surveying the situation. He didn’t want to say something out of place and risk a potential splat on the pavement below. He figured light humor was probably the best way to go. Tony always responded well to that.

“Should I be concerned that you’re literally teetering on the edge of a bridge? No offense, man, but that’s a pretty cliché way to go. Even for you.”

That earned him a soft laugh.

“Nah, you don’t need to be worried. I’m not planning on jumping. Even though you have to admit that it’d be a hell of a shock for the tabloids. ‘Tony Stark Jumps Off Manhattan Bridge! You Can’t Make This Shit Up!’” He spread his hands out like he was showing the headline of a newspaper.

Clint was laughing with him, some of the worry easing its way out. The night air had just started to cool off, so it really was a pleasant evening for taking in the scenery. Even if it was at the top of a hundred-year-old bridge.

“Okay then. Since you’re not trying to create the most expensive speed bump in the world, wanna tell me what we’re doing up here?” Tony shrugged and rested his elbows on his knees, giving Clint a smidge of anxiety back. _‘Could he not lean so close to the edge?’_ He swallowed and tried to not let it worry him. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want.”

A second passed, and then another.

“I guess I just wanted to remind myself why we’re all doing this. What this is all even for.” As he spoke, he swept one hand out, gesturing to the entire city.

The lights of thousands of people’s homes twinkled below. Though the sounds of the city had nearly all faded away, they could still hear some muffled echoes. Skyscrapers and apartments and businesses all teeming with life spanned the horizon.

And Clint understood. Sometimes they had to remember that they fought for the people who couldn’t always fight for themselves. And even though their own lives and problems were important, they were part of something bigger. Something that required strength and courage that wasn’t always easy to muster up. They all felt that need for a reminder from time to time.

Clint smiled, and then smacked him on the back of his head. “You – no don’t give me ‘ _ow’ –_ you own one of the tallest buildings in the city! And you decided to get all angsty and climb the Manhattan Bridge! That’s one of the most bullshit rich people things I’ve ever heard of!”

Tony was laughing whole heartedly, leaning back away from the edge. “It’s not as fun if it’s your own building! I like trespassing.”

“I should shove you off myself for making me worry. Ass.”

Tony waved him off and they settled back into silence. The night air passed between them.

Tony gazed across the cityscape, his eyes speaking volumes. He broke the silence.

“Did Steve mean what he said?”

The defeat and hope in his voice clashed like tidal waves.

Clint put his arm around Tony’s shoulders and looked him right in the eyes. “No.”

The tension bled out of Tony all at once, and Clint could feel him sag in relief. “Okay.” Quickly enough that it made Clint’s heart jump in his throat, Tony stood. “Let’s get outta here. Thor better not have eaten all the popcorn already. And I don’t care that its your turn to pick, I’m not watching Die Hard again.” He reached a hand down.

Clint accepted it and was pulled to his feet. “Fuck you, we’re watching Die Hard just because you said that.” They were both laughing as they started down the ladder. Clint went first so he could make sure ‘Mr. My Shoes Cost More Than The Empire State Building’ didn’t slip.

They’d only gone a couple feet when Clint stopped.

Tony glanced down at him. “What, you enjoying the view too much?” And he stuck his ass out a little for emphasis.

Clint shook his head in exasperation. He gave the other man a serious look.

“Why me?”

“Huh?”

“Why’d you ask me to come?”

Unexpectedly, Tony gave a loud bark of a laugh. “Well, you see, I’d suddenly found myself up pretty high and I just wasn’t entirely sure I’d be able to make it back down. And you’re the only person I know who can go from being perched in weird places to on the ground in minutes.”

That really hadn’t been the answer Clint was expecting. He laughed back at him, “You can be such a dick sometimes!”

It didn’t take terribly long to reach the bottom, but as Tony was stepping off the last rung, Clint reached out pulled him into a tight hug. He sighed into the man’s hair.

“We’re your family, too, y’know? We miss you.”

Tony hesitantly wrapped his arms around Clint, leaning into the embrace. There was no point in lying, he was too choked up to answer. He just nodded into Clint’s shoulder.

They stayed like that for probably longer than necessary, but Tony had longed for the contact and Clint didn’t mind giving it. When they finally pulled away, Clint felt a wet spot on his shirt, just above his hip. He looked at the dark stain on his side, and then to the matching stain underneath Tony’s jacket.

“Dude, what’d you spill on yourself- _is that blood?!”_ Clint’s brain took a moment to piece it together, but in an instant his hands were all over the other man.

Tony tried to swat him away and gave a little chuckle. “Oh yeah. I forgot why I’d gone up there in the first place. So I was leaving the gala- would you relax, its just a scratch- I’m leaving the gala, and these two guys come up to me telling me to give them my wallet.” He swatted Clint’s hands away, earning an incredulous look. “Anyways! I’m like “who the fuck mugs Tony Stark?” because c’mon, you could come up to me on the street and ask me _nicely_ for money and I’d give it to you. Anyways I didn’t even have a wallet on me, so I told ‘em to fuck off and well they just didn’t like that.”

“You’re a goddamn idiot!”

“Hush, I’m telling a story.” He swatted Clint away again. “So yeah they weren’t so happy about that. It was pretty easy taking out the two of ‘em, but I guess one got a little swipey swipe in with his switchblade. By the way, you might wanna tell Coulson to check the alley behind that hotel.”

Clint grumbled something under his breath and shot a text to Phil. “And how did being mugged lead to you at the top of Manhattan Bridge?”

Tony gestured to the small stain on his shirt. “I figured getting mugged was reaching my rock bottom. And what better way to escape rock bottom than get as high as possible?”

Clint slapped a hand over his face in exasperation. “Yes, that makes perfect sense. Unlike maybe coming home? Or going to a hospital? Those would have been totally unreasonable options.” Clint gave the stain a good hard look, and decided it actually was just a scratch. Had it been any worse, he’d have put up more of a fight to get it taken care of. “Bruce can take a look at it when we get back. You ready to go?”

“Can we keep this on the quiet side? I don’t wanna deal with any fussing tonight.” Tony gave his best puppy dog eyes, even going so far to quiver his lip for the dramatics of it all.

And wasn’t Clint always a pushover for the puppy dog eyes. “Fine! Slap a Band-Aid on that and we’ll stop somewhere on the way back for new shirts. You’re buying, though!”

When they returned to the tower, two new shirts later, everyone was still waiting in the living room. Thor and Bruce seemed surprised to find Clint come back with Tony in tow, but Natasha had already been pretty suspicious of what was going on.

Steve, on the other hand, looked petrified.

Without another word, Clint plopped on the couch and snagged the remote. “We’re watching Die Hard, no objections.”

“Every time you force me to watch Die Hard, I’m gonna add an extra 24-hour delay on your arrow production,” Tony said as he sat in his spot, not as stretched out as usual but also not uncomfortably stiff. He turned to Steve and gave him a small smile. “Hi.”

Steve swallowed the lump in his throat and offered his own smile in return. “Hi,” he responded, hardly above a whisper.

In the next moment, the movie started and everyone settled into comfortable silence.

Steve leaned back easily, thinking maybe things could go back to normal after all.

Not 12 hours later, he was proved wrong.

* * *

 

Time slowed down.

Thick, rancid smoke filled his lungs. The stench of death heavy in the air. It was impossible to breathe.

 He couldn’t breathe anyways.

And what was that ringing? God, he couldn’t hear a thing over it. It filled his head, made it seem like there was cotton in his ears.

_“-eve”_

Dust and ash clouded the landscape. It was like living in a black and white movie. Everything was muted and dull, shades of gray blending into one another, hardly a single defined shape to be found.

A memory came to him suddenly. _“Throw in a little hot-rod red!”_ Tony had shown him a video of the creation of the Mark III, once. He’d looked so young.

And there, in stark contrast to the smoke, shone a glimmer of red and gold.

Suddenly, everything came back into focus.

Clint was shouting through the comm, desperation dripping in his voice. “Steve! Steve, _c’mon!”_

Steve took in a sharp breath and took off towards the suit, cutting through the haze. “Hawkeye! Update, _now_!”

An explosion far to his left. “It’s finished. Hulk and Thor are taking care of the last of them. But it’s over.” He paused to swallow. “He ended it.” The finality of the statement was like a ton of bricks raining down.

“Then start looking for survivors.” Steve clicked his comm off, just for a few minutes. Just until he knew Tony was okay.

Steve pulled his cowl off and wiped a grimy glove over his face, smoothing a wetness away.

He had to be okay.

It hadn’t even been 7 in the morning when the Avengers alarm blared throughout the tower. Apparently, some pissed off grad student thought his rejected capstone project needed to be tested in the city.

This led to the city being swarmed with hybrid feral animals/stolen Chitauri technology. Since the tech was no longer being powered by whatever gave it energy in space, the team (Tony and Bruce) figured there was a new energy source stashed somewhere in the city.

They’d tracked it down but hadn’t been able to destroy it before The Hulk was drawn out.

Only Tony had known the location. And he had no intentions of sharing it.

_“Iron Man, I want you to take some backup!” Steve shouted into the comm while slicing straight through a lion hybrid._

_Tony whooshed by, blasting off a group of hyenas with a whine of his repulsors. “Everyone’s tied up. It’ll be faster if it’s just me.” He was speaking too calmly, too subdued._

_“That’s an order, Tony!”_

_A bear hybrid, about to tear straight through Steve, was suddenly shot away. Steve propped himself up and found Tony hovering a few feet away. He gave a small wave._

_“I’ve got this, Cap.”_

Steve fell to his knees next to the mangled heap of armor. His hands hovered mere centimeters above the scraps. Bits and pieces had either been torn or blown away. Blood pooled out of a missing section in the abdomen.

Steve thought he was going to pass out.

He tuned his comm connection with Jarvis, hoping the AI still had a signal with the suit. “Jarvis?”

The response was hardly above a whisper.

“Vitals critical.”

Steve choked back a sob. “T-tell me… what… is there anything I can do?”

“There is no damage to the spinal cord, and no risk of paralysis. You may… you could remove the suit, if you’d like.”

Steve understood. It wouldn’t save Tony, but he would at least be able to see him.

He painstakingly took the pieces off, careful around any damaged parts. When he finished, it was just him and Tony surrounded by bloody scraps of metal.

Steve carefully brushed the hair out of Tony’s face. He could see his labored breaths, so at least he was still alive, for the moment.

All he could think to say was “Why?”

He didn’t receive an answer.

Hands were on him suddenly, pulling him back. He struggled in their hold until Natasha stepped into his field of vision.

“Steve, we need you to step back, okay? Can you do that? The medical team needs you to take a couple steps back.” She knelt down in front of him and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. Her tone was soothing, like she was speaking to a child. When he didn’t budge, she gave him a small smile. “Can you do that? For me?”

He broke out of the trance and nodded, allowing himself to be led back by Thor. He was a familiar presence right at Steve’s back. Clint showed up next, filling the space immediately to his left. Bruce was Bruce again, and he was pretty much asleep on his feet, only being held up by Thor. After Coulson arrived to take over with the med team, Natasha came and placed herself right in front of Steve, blocking most of the scene a few paces ahead of the group.

Natasha gently tiled Steve’s head down so they made eye contact. “Hey, it’s going to be okay.” He nodded and tried to watch as they loaded Tony into the med vehicle. He wondered why Coulson got to go with him.

“He’ll be fine, Steve.” Natasha said to pull him out of his thoughts. “We’re going to the hospital right now, okay?”

He tried to walk towards the med vehicle. “Can’t I go with him?”

Bruce seemed to wake up a little and grabbed Steve’s arm. “You have a bite mark. We all do, actually. The med team is going to need to make sure we didn’t get anything from those animals, first.” He paused to smile up at Steve. “You’ll be the first to see him once he’s able, don’t worry.”

Steve nodded, essentially numb at this point. He wanted to believe their comforting words, but Jarvis’ assessment still lingered on his mind. He slumped at the memory, not bothering with false appearances.

“Okay.”

* * *

 

 _“Hell,”_ he thought absently, _“is a bit disappointing.”_

Tony kept his eyes shut, listening to the droning beep coming from the monitor next to his bed. He knew this wasn’t hell, but he almost wished it was. The morphine drip wasn’t quite strong enough to completely take away his pain, but it was dulled enough that he could stand to be awake.

The events from… yesterday? Two days ago? What day even was it? Whatever. The events from that fight came flooding back to him. The grotesque mutant animals, the weird alien tech, the damn ‘energy source’, which had been closer to a bomb in design than anything to do with a power station. It had all been a cluster.

It had been about an hour in, when Tony realized they weren’t going to win that fight. Clint and Natasha had all but run out of ammo, Thor’s charge was starting to wane, Bruce had been hulked out far too long, and Steve couldn’t toss that frisbee forever.

Those bastard animals had even torn some holes in the suit.

He and Bruce had figured out where the energy transmission was coming from, but they’d also realized it was being guarded by about a hundred or so of the hybrids. Tony really didn’t believe any of them would get through in one piece.

He’d fought tooth and nail, taken blasts from Chitauri tech and swipes from over-powered animals, and could’ve _swore_ he’d seen a fucking chihuahua in the mix, before finally reaching the source.

And then the only way to turn it off was to blow the damn thing to smithereens.

Tony remembered thinking there were worse ways to go.

_“At least there weren’t any wormholes involved this time.”_

The last thing he remembered was aiming a repulsor blast at the box, and that was that.

Bringing himself back to the present situation, he wondered how long he could feign sleep before someone noticed. He was sure at least one person was in the room, if the warmth and weight around his hand was anything to go on. It was nice, just laying there, not having any responsibilities for just a few minutes. It was nearly peaceful.

“Tony?”

Well that had lasted long.

He slowly cracked his eyes open, blinking away the dryness that had built up. Once he was able to see clearly, he realized it was Steve holding onto his hand for dear life.

He gave him a gentle smile. “Well, you look like shit.” Tony croaked out.

Steve looked surprised for a moment, and then suddenly broke out in laughter. “Oh like you’re one to talk.” He helped Tony sit up and take a couple sips of water, being mindful of all the bandages and swatting at his hands when he tried to yank out his own iv. “How you feeling?”

“Like the Energizer Bunny went rogue and I saw the better end of those drum sticks.”

Steve chuckled, “I guess that’s one way to put it.”

“How’s the rest of the team? Any mutant animal rabies?”

He shook his head. “Everyone’s fine. None of the animals were infected with anything contagious. They’re out helping with cleanup right now.”

“Why aren’t you with them? You always help with cleanup.”

“I wanted to be with you.”

Tony gave him a curious look, and the two fell into silence.

Slowly, Steve’s smile slipped off his face. He took a deep breath, and grabbed Tony’s hand with both of his.

“Tony, I… I need to say something to you.” Tony stiffened in his seat, nearly pulling his hand away. Sirens were going off in his head until Steve interjected, “It’s nothing bad! I just… I need to apologize to you. And I need to do it right this time.

“I’ve been so scared these last few days thinking I’d never be able to tell you how I really feel. I kept thinking _‘what if I never get the chance to make things right’_ and jeez, I don’t know what I would’ve done if you didn’t make it.”

He scooted his chair impossibly close to Tony and finally looked him in the eyes.

Tony could see there was nothing but love in them.

“Tony, you gave me a home. You gave me a family and I’m an idiot for ever taking that for granted. You’re kind and smart and you’ve given me everything. You took us all in when we had nowhere to go and made sure we never wanted for anything. And I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make up for what I’ve done. I can’t bare to think about you not being in my life anymore.

“I love you.”

Tony couldn’t help the grin the spread across his face. He reached out and grabbed onto the collar of Steve’s shirt, pulling him close. “God that’s so fucking corny. _Come here._ ”

Steve didn’t realize just how much he missed the way Tony’s beard scratched against his face, or the feel of his soft lips on his own, or the soft moan of pleasure he always let slip out.

After they parted, Steve huffed out a little laugh. “So does that mean you forgive me?”

Tony wrapped his arms around his neck and smiled into his mouth.

“I can’t stay mad at you.”

...

“So, they kiss and make up?”

Clint turned away from the glass to see Natasha, Thor, and Bruce heading towards the room. Natasha tilted her head towards the glass in reference to her question.

“Yeah, fam’s all back together now.”


End file.
